A long long time ago, after I'd graduated from high school, I was sad to leave my precious theatre. But then! Glorious day! I learned that my little town had a community theatre where anyone could audition. My first time I auditioned for a show, I met a ton of new people all different ages, all lovers of theatre, and I thought it was a beautiful thing. Because there were those who'd been doing shows for Years and those who were not so experienced. But we all did the same audition and we were all treated the same. I went on to do three plays there before I left on my mission (in 2008).
Then in 2011, I came back home from Univeristy. I was excited to get back in the shows at my cozy little theatre. But, it had All changed. It was no longer a "community" but the theatre committee and their friends. Since 2011 to today (2014), I've been in two plays, though I've auditioned for A lot more. I'm not saying I'm a wonderful actor and need to be cast in everything. What I'm saying is-people notice when the same committee/directors cast the Same people in their shows. This isn't a community, it's become a clique. And it makes me sad and angry.
I used to love going to auditions not only to audition but also to see my fellow theatre friends whom I Only saw at auditions. But now, when I go, I have a little feeling of dread because I know I wouldn't see those old friends who are distancing themselves on purpose. And I dread seeing Certain people at the audition because I know-if they're there, I have no chance in getting a part. And sadly, I'm Always right.
I hope someday, the commitee changes. I hope that they don't kill theatre here because of their discouraging "clique". I hope that some hopeful highschool graduates will continue their love for theatre and not give up on this theatre, because I already have.
Thursday, September 18, 2014
Thursday, December 13, 2012
“Maturity is knowing when to be immature.”
I was looking for a good quote about being mature, or at least had the word 'mature' in it, but I saw this quote (by Randall Hall) and I thought-how perfect! Exactly my point for this blog post!
Now, when someone first meets me, they never can guess my correct age. Why? Well I definitly look younger, and my silly personality is taken as "immature". And for years and years thats what I just thought-I was a lady in her early twenties that was immature. I used the excuse that more than 50% of my friends were younger then me, I baby-sat, and I worked at a day-care (I've worked there for a year and five months). Are those components what really influence the way I act? Nope.
Over these past few months I've realized something-I am not immature. How did I come to this conclusion? Being around people that were still in the -teen category. In my last blog, I posted about helping with the high school play. And it was a fun, exciting experience. But, it was also hard in the social aspect; I'm stuck backstage with all these girls and I didn't really have anything to say. Nor, did they. Those times were so awkward, I hated it.
Last week, I just got done helping with the makeup for another play at the local community college. The director had asked for my help ONE week before opening night. That was definitly stressful. And again, most of the cast was younger then me-and there is where I had the epiphany!
I can laugh and giggle! Find pleasure in bubbles and simple things! Make random jokes that don't make sense, and dance like a goof to the music in my head-not because I'm immature, but because thats me. I have a silly personality, but I am mature. How did I realize this? Conversations! People in both plays would say certain things and I would just roll my eyes and think "Are you stupid?" And they weren't, their brains just haden't developed yet. I may not be mature in the 'married with a child' sense or mature in the 'real career' sense. BUT, I'm a 26 yr. old woman whos served a mission, gone away to college, I have a job, I have rent payments, and fully researched opinions on a lot of things. I AM mature.
And finally realizing this, finally coming to terms, that this silly peronality with lots of energy has mature opinions and thoughts on matters that are important to me is both scary and exhilarating. I may not be doing my choice career yet or living where I'd rather be living, or heck I'm not married yet. But I am a grown up now. A silly happy grown up.
Now, when someone first meets me, they never can guess my correct age. Why? Well I definitly look younger, and my silly personality is taken as "immature". And for years and years thats what I just thought-I was a lady in her early twenties that was immature. I used the excuse that more than 50% of my friends were younger then me, I baby-sat, and I worked at a day-care (I've worked there for a year and five months). Are those components what really influence the way I act? Nope.
Over these past few months I've realized something-I am not immature. How did I come to this conclusion? Being around people that were still in the -teen category. In my last blog, I posted about helping with the high school play. And it was a fun, exciting experience. But, it was also hard in the social aspect; I'm stuck backstage with all these girls and I didn't really have anything to say. Nor, did they. Those times were so awkward, I hated it.
Last week, I just got done helping with the makeup for another play at the local community college. The director had asked for my help ONE week before opening night. That was definitly stressful. And again, most of the cast was younger then me-and there is where I had the epiphany!
I can laugh and giggle! Find pleasure in bubbles and simple things! Make random jokes that don't make sense, and dance like a goof to the music in my head-not because I'm immature, but because thats me. I have a silly personality, but I am mature. How did I realize this? Conversations! People in both plays would say certain things and I would just roll my eyes and think "Are you stupid?" And they weren't, their brains just haden't developed yet. I may not be mature in the 'married with a child' sense or mature in the 'real career' sense. BUT, I'm a 26 yr. old woman whos served a mission, gone away to college, I have a job, I have rent payments, and fully researched opinions on a lot of things. I AM mature.
And finally realizing this, finally coming to terms, that this silly peronality with lots of energy has mature opinions and thoughts on matters that are important to me is both scary and exhilarating. I may not be doing my choice career yet or living where I'd rather be living, or heck I'm not married yet. But I am a grown up now. A silly happy grown up.
Sunday, October 28, 2012
"But now and then there are Saturdays. Big temporal tipping points when anythings Possible."
I was introduced to the t.v. show Doctor Who many years ago. But I never had the chance to watch as much as I wanted. Until now! With Netflix, I was able to watch Doctor Who beginning with the 9th Doctor. But because it is netflix, I haven't been able to the 7th season with Matt Smith-maybe someday! I don't know if I'd call myself a Whovian (the name givin' to fans), but I do own a t-shirt, a TARDIS phone case, and quote it occasionally. I'm a fan, but I'm not obsessed, I think?
(By the way, the Title of this Post is a Doctor Who quote)
What else is new? I'm still at that stupid daycare. And I hate it. BUT since school has started I told the boss lady that I wasn't available after 2.30. That way, I can go to the high school and help with the play production. Not only that, but cutting my hours has really helped my stress and happiness and sanity levels. Even though its less pay. Speakin' of the High School, the play is Get Smart and its based in the 1960s. SO, I got to be in charge of buying the wigs and designing the makeup for the actors. Tomorrow will be the first time with makeup, costumes, and wigs; I'm really nervous that stuff will go wrong, because its just going to be me doing it all.
AND on the subject of makeup and costumes: Halloween is in three days! My "real" costume is a tough Lil Red Riding Hood:. I'm going to use my skillz and give myself a wolf scratch and some other wounds. But, that costumes too violent for work, so I'm going to wear something completely different. AND there's the church dance on Wednesday, I'm the DJ!
And now, for the meat of this blog. last Saturday, there was a church activity an hour and a half away from where I live. It was an activity for us young single adults to meet other young single adults. Long story short, I met this guy. He was really attached to me, and it was nice. Well, we exchanged numbers to get to know each other better. He even came up this weekend. And I realized-this guy is not for me! He was waaay too touchy. I like being sweet just as much as the next girl, but rubbing my back ALL the time: cooking, brushing my teeth, it kinda drove me crazy. Not to mention through texts and in person I think he told me I was beautiful, amazing and/or a princess every other sentence. Ugh, so not my style. He was talking pretty serious, like marriage in the future serious. So I'm gonna have to call him tomorrow and tell him gently "Not a chance." Funny, I was talking to my mom & dad about him, and they agreed that he wasn't for me. And mom pointed out that I've gone through 4 different guys this year. All four had interest in me, but there wasn't a spark. I joked that they all had the problems. My standards aren't too high, I just know what I want/need. And those are my thoughts.
What else is new? I'm still at that stupid daycare. And I hate it. BUT since school has started I told the boss lady that I wasn't available after 2.30. That way, I can go to the high school and help with the play production. Not only that, but cutting my hours has really helped my stress and happiness and sanity levels. Even though its less pay. Speakin' of the High School, the play is Get Smart and its based in the 1960s. SO, I got to be in charge of buying the wigs and designing the makeup for the actors. Tomorrow will be the first time with makeup, costumes, and wigs; I'm really nervous that stuff will go wrong, because its just going to be me doing it all.
AND on the subject of makeup and costumes: Halloween is in three days! My "real" costume is a tough Lil Red Riding Hood:. I'm going to use my skillz and give myself a wolf scratch and some other wounds. But, that costumes too violent for work, so I'm going to wear something completely different. AND there's the church dance on Wednesday, I'm the DJ!
And now, for the meat of this blog. last Saturday, there was a church activity an hour and a half away from where I live. It was an activity for us young single adults to meet other young single adults. Long story short, I met this guy. He was really attached to me, and it was nice. Well, we exchanged numbers to get to know each other better. He even came up this weekend. And I realized-this guy is not for me! He was waaay too touchy. I like being sweet just as much as the next girl, but rubbing my back ALL the time: cooking, brushing my teeth, it kinda drove me crazy. Not to mention through texts and in person I think he told me I was beautiful, amazing and/or a princess every other sentence. Ugh, so not my style. He was talking pretty serious, like marriage in the future serious. So I'm gonna have to call him tomorrow and tell him gently "Not a chance." Funny, I was talking to my mom & dad about him, and they agreed that he wasn't for me. And mom pointed out that I've gone through 4 different guys this year. All four had interest in me, but there wasn't a spark. I joked that they all had the problems. My standards aren't too high, I just know what I want/need. And those are my thoughts.
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Making a Life
I've been working at that daycare for seven months. And hoo boy, has it been an experience. I've learned a lot about the "real world" and I gotta say; it's not pleasant. My co-workers talk about each other behind their backs, tattle on one another to the boss, there's no communication, and the worst of the worst: my boss does not know how to do math. I decided to be smart and do the math myself (with Dads help) turns out I'm not getting paid for ALL the hours I've worked. It really ticks me off, and that's IS the last straw, but I'm not quitting 'till April. You may ask why not just quit now. Well I've already asked for a week off in April, and it wouldn't be fair to get a new job then ask for a week off so soon. And besides I really need to save for my my week off.
Which by the way is going to be awesome-my week off in April, that is! I finally get to see the Broadway musical Wicked in Portland, then, drive up to Seattle for a weekend of SakuraCon. Which I'm totally not prepared for! I've paid for my tickets and registration-BUT I have no idea how I'm getting to my destinations or how I'm getting home, NOR do I know where I'm sleeping. Oh and my cosplay for the SakuraCon isn't even finished. *Sigh*
AND finally! I'm in another play! I auditioned for The Hobbit. There were only two girl parts: a lady troll and the eleven queen, then multiple characters that could be either/or. So on the first night of auditions (there were two), I made myself an elf ear out of nose&scar wax just to show my skills. If I didn't get cast I really wanted to do makeup. SO they called me up I've been cast as Elf-Guard 2 AND help with making elf ears, but I hope I get to do more makeup than that.
Speaking of makeup I found an academy I really like. Before I couldn't decide, where to move, which was cheaper, where I could learn more, etc. But the I found the QC Academy and its ONLINE! I get the materials, I learn on my own time, I submit my "homework" on my own time, then I get help where I need it, then a little multiple choice quiz, THEN a certificate, and it's not too badly priced. So now all I gotta do is save up to get out of my hometown-where I just don't know yet.
And in other big news. I was in a actually relationship. It was long distance and it was...nice, I guess. We've known each other for quite a while, but we decided to try the whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing. It lasted like 4 months; but I'm glad i got the experience. Now I know what it feels like to not have chemistry and now I know what I want and not want in a future relationship/husband-which is ya know kinda important.
So, that's it. I just need to save up a bajillion dollars and get out of here. To a bigger city and make a life!
Which by the way is going to be awesome-my week off in April, that is! I finally get to see the Broadway musical Wicked in Portland, then, drive up to Seattle for a weekend of SakuraCon. Which I'm totally not prepared for! I've paid for my tickets and registration-BUT I have no idea how I'm getting to my destinations or how I'm getting home, NOR do I know where I'm sleeping. Oh and my cosplay for the SakuraCon isn't even finished. *Sigh*
AND finally! I'm in another play! I auditioned for The Hobbit. There were only two girl parts: a lady troll and the eleven queen, then multiple characters that could be either/or. So on the first night of auditions (there were two), I made myself an elf ear out of nose&scar wax just to show my skills. If I didn't get cast I really wanted to do makeup. SO they called me up I've been cast as Elf-Guard 2 AND help with making elf ears, but I hope I get to do more makeup than that.
Speaking of makeup I found an academy I really like. Before I couldn't decide, where to move, which was cheaper, where I could learn more, etc. But the I found the QC Academy and its ONLINE! I get the materials, I learn on my own time, I submit my "homework" on my own time, then I get help where I need it, then a little multiple choice quiz, THEN a certificate, and it's not too badly priced. So now all I gotta do is save up to get out of my hometown-where I just don't know yet.
And in other big news. I was in a actually relationship. It was long distance and it was...nice, I guess. We've known each other for quite a while, but we decided to try the whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing. It lasted like 4 months; but I'm glad i got the experience. Now I know what it feels like to not have chemistry and now I know what I want and not want in a future relationship/husband-which is ya know kinda important.
So, that's it. I just need to save up a bajillion dollars and get out of here. To a bigger city and make a life!
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Work, Play, Babies
So I've been looking for a job for a while. And while looking I've been babysitting like crazy. But then I applied at daycare. To get the job I had to get certified in first aid and cpr. I got a food handlers card and a tb test (it was negative, like I knew it would be). And I had to read a lot. Theres a lot of rules and regulations that I'm worried I'll break or mess up. But I've got the job and I start as soon as they call me about my hours. Yay for doing what I'm supposed to do and receiving blessings.
Babysitting has been...interesting. And I finally faced a full tantrum. I handled it well (Except I wanted to push the grandmother out of the house who was making it worse). Of course many of my friends and family thought it was humorous and all basically said "wait till you have kids" AND I say to that-my children won't act like that. Of course there are those that say I can't say that since I don't have children. But I know what I can teach them and I will teach them about inappropriate behavior. My parents did it and my brother and I never actually had tantrums. So it IS possible.
But thats all, I have a job, still babysitting, and the play season starts in August. I'm way excited for that.
Babysitting has been...interesting. And I finally faced a full tantrum. I handled it well (Except I wanted to push the grandmother out of the house who was making it worse). Of course many of my friends and family thought it was humorous and all basically said "wait till you have kids" AND I say to that-my children won't act like that. Of course there are those that say I can't say that since I don't have children. But I know what I can teach them and I will teach them about inappropriate behavior. My parents did it and my brother and I never actually had tantrums. So it IS possible.
But thats all, I have a job, still babysitting, and the play season starts in August. I'm way excited for that.
Friday, May 20, 2011
'Tis the season to be...
'Tis the season to...be married. fa la la la la.
No seriously, it's getting warmer so all the wedding announcements are coming. and it's soo weird! Little girls I knew when they were 12 are now 18 and getting married, kidsI knew in high school are getting married, returned missionaries I met are getting married, AND married friends I know are having/had babies already! Don't get me wrong, I don't feel bitter or upset like "It should be me" *mope* pity party *mope* I just think-good for them.
I'll be turning 25 in September and I'm single. Do I ever think about having a significant other? Yes. Will it ever happen in this life? I think so! My "goal" is to get hitched at least by age 38 (but now that I've put that in writing, I probably jinxed myself). In the past (err and present) I've had little girlish daydreams of marrying certain young men. But those are just daydreams, I can't see the future.
I don't really know why I'm spilling my guts about such a subject, but with all the weddings it's been on my mind.
No seriously, it's getting warmer so all the wedding announcements are coming. and it's soo weird! Little girls I knew when they were 12 are now 18 and getting married, kidsI knew in high school are getting married, returned missionaries I met are getting married, AND married friends I know are having/had babies already! Don't get me wrong, I don't feel bitter or upset like "It should be me" *mope* pity party *mope* I just think-good for them.
I'll be turning 25 in September and I'm single. Do I ever think about having a significant other? Yes. Will it ever happen in this life? I think so! My "goal" is to get hitched at least by age 38 (but now that I've put that in writing, I probably jinxed myself). In the past (err and present) I've had little girlish daydreams of marrying certain young men. But those are just daydreams, I can't see the future.
I don't really know why I'm spilling my guts about such a subject, but with all the weddings it's been on my mind.
Monday, May 2, 2011
A New Direction and a New Found Hobby
All my life my career goal was to be a teacher; as I grew the subject of what I taught changed (music, art, kindergarten, history, the fifth grade). Then in high school I discovered drama and since then my career goal was to be a drama teacher.
But I don't want to do that anymore. I feel like I've been in school for too long. I'm tired of homework and recently, tired of not being cast in any show. Now that may sound snotty but it's what kept me going before. I could handle loads of homework because I had the enjoyment of rehearsals and performances to balance it out. But without a show, I have extra time to be bored.
SO! I have decided to go on a completely different career path. I really enjoy doing make-up, and I know with a little more training & practice I can be doing it professionally for the stage and/or movies(and tv). Don't think I'm dropping out of school completely, I've also decided that once I save up more tuition money I'll just get a general theatre degree.
And about that new hobby: during Easter weekend I went with a couple friends to Sakura Con (a convention) dedicated to anime, manga, and pretty much anything Japanese culture. We also cosplayed, and seeing all the other con-goer's cosplay and wigs I realized knowing how to do that would not only be fun but VERY helpful to my new career choice. My sewing skills aren't that good but I'm already working on it AND I bought a wig and found to my pleasure I'm pretty good at styling! And I can't wait for next years convention!
I thought I might as well add an update on my current location. As I said before I have run out of tuition money, so I'm living with my parents looking for a job, at least I was, I caught bronchitis and haven't been doing anything. But I've been taking a load of gross medicine and WILL get better soon!
But I don't want to do that anymore. I feel like I've been in school for too long. I'm tired of homework and recently, tired of not being cast in any show. Now that may sound snotty but it's what kept me going before. I could handle loads of homework because I had the enjoyment of rehearsals and performances to balance it out. But without a show, I have extra time to be bored.
SO! I have decided to go on a completely different career path. I really enjoy doing make-up, and I know with a little more training & practice I can be doing it professionally for the stage and/or movies(and tv). Don't think I'm dropping out of school completely, I've also decided that once I save up more tuition money I'll just get a general theatre degree.
And about that new hobby: during Easter weekend I went with a couple friends to Sakura Con (a convention) dedicated to anime, manga, and pretty much anything Japanese culture. We also cosplayed, and seeing all the other con-goer's cosplay and wigs I realized knowing how to do that would not only be fun but VERY helpful to my new career choice. My sewing skills aren't that good but I'm already working on it AND I bought a wig and found to my pleasure I'm pretty good at styling! And I can't wait for next years convention!
I thought I might as well add an update on my current location. As I said before I have run out of tuition money, so I'm living with my parents looking for a job, at least I was, I caught bronchitis and haven't been doing anything. But I've been taking a load of gross medicine and WILL get better soon!
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